Game of Thrones Characters, Based on Who They’d Be at the Gym

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If you’re not immersed in the Game of Thrones fandom—or honestly, even if you are—it can be difficult to keep track of all the character you’re supposed to know. There’s a seemingly endless amount of people who inhabit Westeros, and that’s just counting the characters who are still alive, who have a part to play in ending this epic tale.

To help you out, we likened the GOT characters to people you already know VERY well: gym-goers. Game Of Thrones returns on April 14th, 2019, so get in shape with your character knowledge before the final season begins.

Tyrion Lannister: The Smoothie Bar Philosopher

Tyrion’s the dude who holds court at the gym smoothie bar. He’s always knocking back protein shakes, advising his fellow gym-goers at the bar on the importance of fitness, protein, and life itself. Even though he rarely actually works out, he always pays his debts, so the staff doesn’t bother him.

Cersei Lannister: That Extremely Confident Naked Person

Cersei’s the person who holds their head high as they walk naked through the dressing room. No shame here! Sure, there’s a private curtained changing area, but she doesn’t need that. She sits nude on the bench in the locker room—almost as if it were a throne—staring critically at you as you try to change beneath a towel.

Jon Snow: The Heartthrob

Jon is the dude whose intentions were pure when he first arrived at the gym: He wanted to get in shape and lead a healthier lifestyle. But a few months in, he’s become the bro known for dating half the staff. You’re a little creeped out to learn that he and his new girlfriend share the same sweaty towel, but you’re willing to look past it!

Daenerys Targaryen: The Show-Off in Hot Yoga

Are you ever an inch from unconsciousness, your vision fading in a 100-degree Bikram yoga class, only to spot the one person who doesn’t seem to be bothered IN THE SLIGHTEST by the heat? That’s Daenerys. She’s front and center doing her vinyasas without breaking a sweat. Her hair isn’t even out of place. What the hell, Daenerys?

Sansa Stark: The Slow Learner

Sansa’s that girl who, when she took her first spin class, couldn’t even figure out how to get her shoes clicked into the pedals. Over time, her confidence grows. Now she sits front and center and sings along to the music—and maybe shouts “THE PACK SURVIVES!” every now and then. You’re proud of how far she’s come!

Arya Stark: The Person With Scary Anger Issues

People go to the gym for a variety of reasons: to get the biggest muscles; to keep their heart healthy; to be able to walk up the stairs without panting. Arya’s the person who’s there to deal with their anger issues. She freaks everyone out in kickboxing class by jabbing just a little too ferociously. You just know she’s imagining knocking out some very specific people…and you pray to the gods (old and new) that you’re not one of them.

Bran Stark: That Guy in Yoga Who’s Always Going on About His ‘Inner Eye’

The Three Eyed Raven loves a good restorative yoga class, and always speaks in the third person as he talks about being connected to the universe. He just went vegan, wears meditation beads around his neck, and says he can see all that is happening in the world. You want to spend a very limited amount of time with this person.

Gendry: The Only Guy Who Uses That Janky Old Rowing Machine

No matter how nice its equipment is, every gym has that one janky rowing machine in the corner. Who would use that? Gendry. That’s who would use that.

Gendry is the guy who never does classes, never mixes it up, never takes advantage of any of the amenities. Instead, he is always stashed away in the corner, endlessly doing sets on the erg.

Jaime Lannister: The Guy Who Gets Injured Immediately

Jaime’s the guy who walked into the gym thinking he was the big man on campus—arrogantly pushing people out of his way to get to the machines first—only to get injured on day 3 of working out. He spends the rest of the year having to ask other people for help, which takes him down quite a few pegs. Now he’s the kindest fellow at the gym, wiping down machines for other people and helping young gym goers get acquainted with the equipment.

Brienne of Tarth: The Woman With No Time for Mansplainers

Brienne’s the lady who instantly intimidates everyone with her muscles the minute she steps onto the floor. There is nothing she can’t do; she can crank out burpees and squats for hours, and legend has it she can bench press more than triple her weight. If you decide to give her unsolicited or incorrect lifting advice, prepare—rightfully so—to get thrown into one of the gym mirrors.

Samwell Tarly: The Guy Who’s Read Up on Every Type of Workout

There’s always an expert on the newest fitness trends, and this is Sam. He’s the walking encyclopedia on every way possible to get fit.
He’s always carrying around a stack of fitness magazines, diagrams, and guides to healthy eating. You’ve never actually seem him put any of it into practice for himself, but hey, it’s nice to learn from his tips!

Jorah Mormont: The Jilted Ex

Jorah’s the guy who joined the gym to get fit after a breakup. He believes that if he can just get buff enough, she’ll finally want him back. Not that he wants her!! No! He’s totally over the whole relationship. Even though his goal is fitness, he spends most of his time talking about his ex to anyone who will listen: she’s perfect, she’s regal, she’s his queen, blah, blah, blah.

Missandei and Grey Worm: The Adorable Fitness Couple

Missandei and Grey Worm are the adorable married couple who always works out together. They have an Instagram filled with cute photos of them hiking and going on yoga retreats. Their happiness brings you happiness. Their love warms your cold, cold heart.

Melisandre: The Woman Who Won’t Take No for an Answer

Melisandre is the lady who is always trying to get her gym contract negotiated lower. She tries a wide range of methods: from poisoning the gym manager’s protein shake to threatening to burn everyone alive if she doesn’t get a discounted rate.

The Night King: The Biggest Bro There Is

The Night King is the biggest gym bro around, the brochacho who spends night and day working out. Does he have a job? A spouse? Some kids? Probably not, ’cause he never leaves! He spends all his time wandering around the facility, staring icily at anyone who looks at him funny. You tried talking to him once—kept it casual and about the weather—and all he could say was…”winter is coming.”

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